


Seven Grownup Spats-Klaus & Nick’s 30th Birthday

by rownthehabbitdole



Series: Seven Deadly Spats [3]
Category: A Series of Unfortunate Events, a series of unfortunate events 2004, a series of unfortunate events Netflix
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Seven deadly spats, six baudelaires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-09
Updated: 2019-10-09
Packaged: 2020-11-28 13:23:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20967263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rownthehabbitdole/pseuds/rownthehabbitdole
Summary: It’s Louis Hynes’ birthday today so this is a quick fluffy oneshot set in the 7DS universe about Nick and Klaus’s 30th birthday. It’s actually mostly about Klaus, because Klaus is Louis Hynes/Netflix Klaus in this story, but of course it is also Nick’s birthday in the story, because that’s how twins work.





	Seven Grownup Spats-Klaus & Nick’s 30th Birthday

**Author's Note:**

> This probably sucks but I hope y’all like it anyway

Klaus Baudelaire was not the type of man who needed all that many material things in his life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He liked to have books, of course, and pen and paper, but the world of objects was not what really pleased him.  
What he really needed was the people he loved.  
He needed his older sisters, Lilac and Violet, who had gotten them through so much.  
He needed his twin brother, Nick, who still sometimes called in the middle of the night to cry and to whimper and to check up on him, but was such a grand adventurer these days.  
He needed his little sisters, Solitude and Sunny, who travelled alongside Nick for various jobs of their own and who reminded him of how dear family really was.  
He needed Beatrice, Beatrice who had gotten him through some of the darkest moments in his life. Was she a sister? At first she seemed more like a daughter to him, but nowadays he thought of her like a niece most of the time, although every time he saw her he thought, “Well look at that. That’s my daughter.”  
And speaking of daughters, he needed his children, all of them, who wrapped him in the love and care that he had once thought he didn’t deserve.  
He needed his husband, who played silly games and gardened and wrote letters to the editor and cared for him so much, loved him so deeply, that even now, seventeen-no, it was eighteen now-eighteen years after he had met him continued to sweep Klaus off his feet.  
He needed the Quagmires and the Spats, who had become some of his best friends in the world and who reminded him that it was okay to laugh and be joyful and alight, even when the rest of the world seemed still and silent. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Klaus had been banished from his house and sent off with Nick to go walk around somewhere.  
Nick had just returned from an expedition to the Amazon rainforest and had returned in time for their birthday, and as the two wondered what kind of party their extraordinarily large family was setting up, he regaled Klaus with tales of climbing and mapping and leaping from great heights into great depths, probably embellishing, but who cares about embellishment? At least they were together.  
Quigley had gone with them, although he occasionally disappeared to give the twins some time alone together, and he listened intently to every single story, especially those about map making.  
Once upon a time he had gone with Nick to explore and had made the maps for them, but now Violet was in the throes of a particularly off putting pregnancy, and he chose instead to stay home with his wife.  
“What did you do then?” Quigley asked, looking fascinated by Nick’s storytelling.  
Chuckling, Nick wrapped one arm around his brother in law and the other around his twin, “Well I channeled my inner Sunny, and I bit the vine as hard as I could, it snapped off, and I swam to freedom.”  
“And then what?” Klaus asked.  
Nick opened his mouth to respond but was cut off as the pay phone next to them rang loudly, and Quigley rushed to answer it.  
“Hello? Yes. Yes. Okay. You sure? Yes. No. For sure. Yes. Alright,” Quigley hung up the pay phone, “We’re all good to head over to my place. Do you want me to get a taxi?”  
Nick looked a little uncomfortable at that, paling slightly, and Klaus shook his head, “I’d rather walk. It’s nice to be out in the sun.”  
Shrugging, Quigley fell into step with the two brothers, “Whatever, man, I don’t care. Let’s go.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When they arrived at the rebuilt Baudelaire Mansion, D and Violet were standing just inside the gates and chatting to each other.  
“Hello darling,” D said when he noticed Klaus, beaming, “How was your morning?”  
Klaus ignored the blush that covered his cheeks and leaned down to kiss his husband, “It’s all the better now that I’m with you.”  
Nick turned to Quigley, looking ready to complain about the PDA, but to his dismay Quigley and Violet had spotted each other, and Quigley was on the ground kissing her swollen belly, “Oh, Vi, how are you feeling, sweetheart? Are you doing alright? You didn’t strain yourself, did you?”  
Violet laughed quietly and pulled Quigley to his face, leaning down to kiss him as well, “I’m just fine, love, don’t worry.”  
“Why are there only couples around me?” Nick snapped, covering his eyes, “This is so gross.”  
“It’s not _just_ couples, actually,” Said a familiar voice next to him, and when Nick turned to look he shrieked in delight.__  
“Soli! You’re here! How are you here?” Nick was beaming, looking over his little sister carefully.  
He heard footsteps behind him, his other siblings and their spouses looking up happily, “She’s not the only one that’s here.”  
“Sunny!” Nick spun around and wrapped his arms around her, and Klaus broke away from his spouse to wrap his two little sisters up in hugs as well.  
“Is there room for one more?” Asked a final voice, and they were overwhelmed with the familiar sweet sharpness of Beatrice Baudelaire II.  
Klaus turned to her gleefully, and indeed his brain did register her as his daughter, and he swept her up into a huge, “Bea! Oh my god, I’ve missed you so much. I’ve missed all three of you so much!”  
The three girls had been off, working on different assignments around the globe for their respective universities.  
Soli, who was a herpetologist and was a teaching assistant while she worked on her second doctorate, had been looking for a wingfooted corn snake, which had been recently discovered in Burma.  
Sunny had been hired by a culinary school in France and had been working very studiously with her students as they started their goal of making the world’s largest creme brulee.  
And Beatrice, who was just in her first year of university, had been chosen to go on a trip to Australia and was spending her time there taking notes on the various bat species they found.  
All three were so busy, they had written their family to tell them that they unfortunately wouldn’t be able to come home for Klaus and Nick’s birthday.  
“We found the snake,” Soli said proudly, pulling out a picture to show her siblings, “It’s raising a lot of questions about the concept of dragons and the way that dragons in mythology are formed.”  
“And we finished the creme brulee,” Sunny pulled out a picture of her own, showing perhaps the largest of those delicacies that they had ever seen.  
“And I discovered that one of the bat species could become impregnated by its male _or_ female fellows, and I got the grant extended to bring some of them back to the city to study,” Beatrice crowed, and Klaus winced a little at how very much like her father Beatrice could sound when she was excited by something.__  
D stepped forward to wrap an arm around Beatrice, knowing exactly what Klaus was thinking, and she hugged him excitedly, “Uncle D! Oh, I’ve missed you so much! How are you?”  
“I’m good,” D chuckled, and he glanced behind him, “Oh, here’s Lilac to join in the family reunion. Apparently she can’t get here on time, huh?”  
Lilac was blushing deeply, her hair ruffled and her lipstick smeared just a tiny bit at the corner, “Sorry, sorry, my wife didn’t really want me to leave her alone with the kids in the house, but I wanted to meet you guys before you came in for the full party.”  
“You guys didn’t have to throw us a party,” Klaus laughed, “We just love you.”  
Quigley and D stood to the side as Nick laughed and pulled Lilac into the Baudelaire group hug, “No, we do love you, but you did also have to throw us a party,” He paused and turned to Quigley and D, “Are your siblings here?”  
“Besides us and the kids, and _maybe_ Friday and Fiona if they can make it, the only guests are the Spats and the Quagmires, so yeah, they’re here,” Violet chuckled, “Who else would there be? You guys don’t have any other friends.”__  
“Hey!” Klaus protested, and then he paused, “I mean, it’s true. But you didn’t have to say it on our birthday.”  
The nine of them made their way into the mansion, finding their friends and families clustered together in the corner of the entry hall and arguing.  
“I think we should hide!” Avery Spats said.  
“I think we shouldn’t!” Isadora Quagmire insisted.  
“I think all of you should hide and I should be standing in the middle because I’m the most important,” Carmelita Spats looked at the family around her, “As long as you all aren’t sniffing the cake.”  
They adults all burst into laughter at that, remembering Carmelita in her prime days of horribleness when they were children.  
Lilac cleared her throat, “Um, guys?”  
Everyone jumped and whipped around to face her, shouting, “Surprise!” As they did so.  
Nick and Klaus glanced at each other, confused, and Sunny stepped forward, “Guys, it’s not really a surprise party.”  
“Oh.”  
“No, no, I think it’s a wonderful surprise party,” Klaus said, smiling warmly at everyone there, “Just about everyone I love is in this r-” He stopped midsentence as he stared at the space between Avery and Richie where Klaus’s ex-boyfriend normally stood, and he grew quiet, “Where is he?”  
Veruca shook her head, “Don’t worry, he’ll be here. He’s just running a little late, his gifts just came in and he’s trying to get them wrapped.”  
“How do you know all that?” Richie demanded, turning around to face his sister.  
“I was eavesdropping while you were on the phone, dummy.”  
Lilith came forward and wrapped her arm around Lilac’s waist, grinning, “Well, a guest or two may be a little late, but it’s still a party! Let’s eat some cake, yeah?”  
“As long as neither of you made it,” Nick quipped back.  
Angelica laughed, “God, we’d never let them in the kitchen. No, Sunny and I made it.”  
“Thank god,” Klaus muttered, and he made his way into the parlor where the huge cake sat, snacks and drinks all around, and the wall surrounding it plastered with photos of the twins. 

_ _ _ _ _ _~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_ _ _ _ _ _

__ __ __ __ __ _This, he thought to himself, this is good._  
He thought this when he took a seat in one of the large chairs and his children mobbed him to share the seat and sit in his lap, including Beatrice, who perched on the armrest happily.  
He thought this when the three missing guests arrived, full of apologies and with gifts in hand.  
He thought this when Nick threw cake at him, and when he threw some back, and when they broke out into an all around food fight in the middle of the parlor, which he knew somewhere in the back of his mind Violet would get them back for later.  
He thought this Carmelita lead everyone in singing happy birthday, and then proceeded to lead them in seventeen more verses of increasingly complicated nature.  
He thought this as he read cards, some funny, some sweet, some that brought a tear to his eye, but all filled with affection.  
He thought this as he opened presents, as people told stories of why they bought it or how it reminded them of him.  
He thought this as his younger sisters teased him, calling him ancient and saying that in a few years he and Nick would be retiring.  
He thought this as his older sisters teased him as well, telling him that he was practically a baby and asking both him and Nick if they would be needing pacifiers and a nap soon.  
And he thought this as the night stretched on, and on, and on, as his siblings told jokes and his friends told stories and his children asked to stay up late and then fell asleep anyway, as his nieces and nephews did the exact same thing, as Nick told him that he was his favorite brother and Carmelita told him that he was her best friend and D told him that he was the best husband that could ever be asked for. As all of them, all of these adults who had gone through such terrible things in their young lives, sat together and celebrated the thirtieth birthdays of Nick and Klaus, he thought about how good this really was. 

_ _ _ _ _ _~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_ _ _ _ _ _

_ _ _ _ _ _No, Klaus Baudelaire was not one who needed material objects. All he needed, he thought sleepily to himself as Violet and Quigley invited everyone to stay for the night in one of the many rooms of the mansion, as all of them decided to sleep together in the parlor anyway, all he really needed was love, and safety, and family._ _ _ _ _ _


End file.
